The GilmoreGrey Union Book II: The Homecoming
by Michael Weyer
Summary: The newlyweds return to Hartford to face two disaproving families and one intrigued town. Crossover with Judging Amy
1. Chapter 1

The Gilmore-Grey Union Book II: Homecoming

By Michael Weyer

I don't own either "Judging Amy" or "Gilmore Girls" so don't sue. Hopefully, you've read Book I but just in case, this first chapter should bring you up to speed. All comments are welcome.

POV: Lauren

Mom didn't want to tell me. She still thinks of me as just a kid. She wanted to "shield me" from the news. Please. Like I don't know what's going on. I've seen Mom bringing some guys over. Heck, I walked in on Uncle Kyle having sex with a woman right in our house. I know how things work.

So, I knew something was wrong when Mom and Grandma both started acting funny. I just came right out and demanded to know what it was. So they told me the truth.

I have to admit, it was a lot to take in. Uncle Vincent getting drunk and marrying some girl he met at a bar in Atlantic City? Even for this family, that's something wild.

Mom and Grandma were in the kitchen for a long time, talking. I just stayed in my room because I know how those talks can be. I just stayed and did homework while I tried to figure this out.

I have no idea what to call her. Aunt Rory? It sounds so…dumb. I just don't get why they can't get it annulled but, hey, it's Uncle Vincent. Not like he hasn't dumb a lot of stupid things before. And those are just the ones since I was born.

So apparently, Mom is going to the airport tomorrow to meet the plane with Vincent and Rory. From there, I have no clue what's going to happen. All I do now is that Rory Gray is going to get a full dose of what this family can be like.

I wonder if I can make a school report out of all this.


	2. Chapter 2

The Gilmore-Grey Union Book II: The Homecoming

By Michael Weyer

POV: Rory

I'm flying home today.

With my husband.

My. Husband.

No matter how many times I run this through my head, I still can't believe it. I'm married. I'm married to a guy I met while drunk so I have no idea what my wedding night was like, which I don't think is the right way at all.

And now we've got to keep it up until we get home. Home to where Mom is waiting with Luke and Grandma and Grandpa and by now Miss Patty has spread the story so the whole town knows about Rory Gilmore's latest descent from golden girl to Hester Prime.

I take a look at Vincent as he sips his soda. He wanted something stronger and so did I but it's a non-alcohol flight. I guess it's better that way since the last time we got some alcohol…well, no need to go there.

Vincent catches my look and gives me that nice smile of his. "You sure you're okay with me? Not your…Logan?"

I take a deep breath. I was not at all happy with Logan trying to pay off Vincent to drop this whole thing. I can't believe he could do something so absolutely stupid and childish. Acting like Vincent just wanted money to end this whole thing is way too much like his father and that really pissed me off.

So we had a talk…okay, we had a screaming match and the long and short of it is that we're on a "break" for a while. Maybe we'll be able to smooth it over once Vincent and I deal with this. Maybe we won't. Right now, I've got much bigger problems on my mind."

"No, no, it's fine," I tell him. "He'll get his own flight back. He can afford it a lot more."

"I guess he can," Vincent says as she shuffles in his seat. "So…what am I in for?"

"Scuse me?"

"Your mom. What's she like?"

I take a breath. "Well, she's more like my best friend than my mom. She broke away from my grandparents to raise me on her own and she's done pretty well. She runs an inn in our town, Stars Hollow."

He nods. "What about your dad?"

I look down. "He, ah….he wasn't really around much. He stops by now and then and my grandma still labors under the delusion he and Mom are meant to be but…" I shake my head. "He's not father material. Not like Luke."

"Luke?"

"He runs a diner in town that we've been going to forever and has the BEST coffee ever made by human hands." I smile as I speak. "He and his mom had this whole flirtation thing going for a while and they've finally gotten together."

"Ah, so wedding bells in the future?" He immediately blanches. "Shit, I can't believe I just said that."

I shrug. "I guess they're moving to that. But…me and Mom…well, we haven't spoken much lately." I bring my arms around me and look to him. "So, how about your family?" Rory Gilmore, master of the smooth segue.

He accepts it and talks. "Dad died when I was a teenager. My mom works for the Department of Children and Family Services in Hartford. Amy, my sister, is a judge in family court. My older brother, Peter, runs the family insurance business. He's got a wife, Gillian and two kids, a boy and a girl. Oh and Lauren, Amy's daughter."

I think about this and frown. "You know, most people find out about each other's families before they get married." My frown deepens. "Oh, God, we're Dharma and Greg. Only, I'm not a quirky tall blonde."

"Never been a fan of that type," he says with that nice smile again. I return and settle back in my chair. "So, how is your mom going to take this?" he goes on.

I shake my head. "Not well. However, as bad as she is, my grandmother is going to give it to you even worse."

"Really?"

"Yep. I'm convinced Amnesty International has her on a list somewhere."

He snorts. "If she is, then my mom is right behind her. As for Amy…" He gives a shrug. "She's a judge so there you go…"

I nod in sympathy. "So, we're gonna be grilled?"

"Like a buffet at the Sizzler."

"Well, wait until you get to Star's Hollow itself. You're going to be the center of attention."

"That bad?"

"Mayberry would be considered a metropolis compared to us."

"Gotcha." He sips his drink again and shakes his head. "I'm really sorry for putting you through this."

"Hey, it was my fault as much as yours. I chose to get drunk and somehow chose you so I'm to blame as well."

"Somehow, I doubt that explanation is gonna fly well with my family," Vincent states.

"I know the feeling." I sit back and gaze out the window, wondering if it's too late to try to hijack the plane to Florida and hid out in the Keys for the rest of my life. And I wonder why the idea of hanging on an island with Vincent is so appealing for a moment.


	3. Chapter 3

The Gilmore-Grey Union Book II: The Homecoming

By Michael Weyer

POV: Amy

Bruce wasn't happy at first when I told him we'd have to change the entire schedule of the day so I could do this. But he quickly understood that it was for Vincent's own good that I was the one to show up at the airport and not Mom. So I'm sitting by the visitor's lounge, waiting for the plane from Atlantic City to debark and going over some files while I wait.

I tap my foot impatiently for a few moments and it takes me a bit to realize I'm echoing the taps of the woman next to me. I glance up to her. She's a couple of years younger than me, long black hair, good looks, in dark skirt and blouse with a worried expression. She catches my expression, frowns, looks down at her leg and stops the tapping. "Sorry."

"It's okay," I say as I flip through the pages, trying and failing to concentrate on the words. "Waiting for someone too?"

"My daughter," she says. "She…got into some trouble during a trip."

"Must be catching," I say. "My brother got into a mess himself."

"Oh, I doubt it's like this."

"You'd be surprised." I snap the folder shut, realizing I won't be able to focus on anything besides Vincent right now. I glance to the woman and feel like talking. "What's she like? Your daughter?"

"Oh, well, until yesterday, she was almost perfect," she answers. "Bright, entergetic, brilliant, good judgement and I loved being able to call her my daughter."

I nod slowly. "How old?"

"21, why?"

I sigh and sit back. "My daughter is a teenager now and I'm trying to understand if it gets easier. She's acting out, she's doing wild stuff like dying her hair and getting her belly pierced and suddenly becoming a vegetarian and…" I shake my head. "I don't know if I can connect with her now."

She makes a thoughtful look. "I don't know what to say. My daughter didn't have a rebellious phase. Maybe it's because I treated her more like a friend than a daughter so that changed things." She snorted. "Maybe that explains what's happening, it had a delayed effect and finally caught up to her."

"Kids," I softly state. "They remind you how little you really understand about life."

"Amen, sister," the woman says with a smile. "But at least we can tell ourselves we do better raising them than our own mothers did with us."

"Now, that, I'll go along with," I laugh. I pause and then stick out my hand. "Sorry, Amy Grey."

"Lorelai Gilmore."

We shake and then our hands slow as the connection is made. We just stare at each other with widening eyes, hands still linked.

"Grey?"

"Gilmore?"

My jaw opens and shuts as I look her over. "You're Rory's mother?" My question is actually "you're the mother of a 21-year old?"

She nods. "Yeah. And you're…Vincent's sister." She licks her lips as she obviously tries to figure this out. "Um…well, ah…I guess we're family now!" She gives me a goofy smile as I just stare in disbelief.

Vincent, Vincent, Vincent, what in hell have you gotten this family into now?


	4. Chapter 4

The Gilmore-Grey Union Book II: The Homecoming

By Michael Weyer

POV: Lorelai

I am sitting here with my…cousin? Sister-in-law? What do I call her now? In the airport. Waiting for my daughter and her…

Come on, Lorelai, push it out.

Husband…to arrive home. I've actually managed to bond with the sister of the man who has wrecked my daughter's life. This isn't life, this is a Woody Allen flick.

She's still staring at me and I know she's trying to figure out whether or not I've been Nip/Tucking. I sigh and decide to get it out in the open right off the bat. Might as well start off on as good a point as I can, right? "I had Rory when I was 16."

She makes an "oooh" face and nods, seeming to accept it, which surprises me a little. "Yeah, birth control was not as big a concern back then, much to our later regret."

She nods slowly. "So, you got pregnant…had Rory…" She pauses. "Pardon a personal question…"

"Well, hell, why would I start now?"

"Why Rory? I mean, it's an odd name."

"It's short for Lorelai."

She gives me the look that I'm used to. The one people always give when they hear this for the first time. "You named your daughter after yourself?"

I get defensive. "Hey, you've been there too! You know how crazy it gets with the pain and drugs and stuff! You try to find an easy name off the top of your head in that situation!"

She seems to begrudge the point there. "Okay, but um…" She shakes her head. "Sorry, this is such a weird situation for us."

"Try being in my shoes," I say with a deep sigh. "She should be in Yale now, not coming home with a new husband."

"Don't blame yourself," she says, putting a hand on my own. "Trust me, Vincent has a track record for pulling people into dumb situations. Do what we're doing, put the blame on him."

I smile at her. "Can I really? Thanks."

"Listen, Lorelai," she continues. "We will handle this. First of all, do you want them to stay married?"

I shake my head vehemently. "No way. The only wedding bells I want to hear are mine."

She nods. "Then we're on the same page already. We're the first line, we talk to them first, we get this settled first, we press on them what a huge mistake this is and that it's best for them to break it off, get it annulled and move on with their lives."

I quickly salute. "Got your back, GI Jane!"

She giggles but then sobers. "Of course, we also have a bigger duty. It's up to us to shield them from the real danger."

"Which is?"

"My mother."

I wince and shake my head. "Uh-huh. It's my mom we have to worry about."

"Oh, no, no, my mother is…oh, Lord, the woman can be judgmental as hell."

I bark out a laugh. "HA! Please! I don't care how bad she is, my mother makes Joan Crawford look like Mother Theresa!"

She rolls her eyes. "My mother is still getting mileage out of guilt trips she put on me back in high school."

"High school? My mom had my life planned out by the day before I could walk!"

"My mother has been dismissive of just about every man I've ever been with."

"My mom almost broke up my relationship to my fiancée because she wanted me and Rory's father together. Top that!

She frowns and I think I've won. "Well, ok." She shakes her head. "So, all right, that just proves that we have to do all it takes to keep this from becoming more of a debacle than it already is."

I sigh deeper than ever. "We can try. But I'm warning you right now, when Emily Gilmore gets going, you'll get more snide remarks and snippy judgments than Joan and Melissa on the red carpet."

She's about to reply when a bustle of movement gets out attention and we look up to see a crowd of passengers exiting from the gate where the Atlantic City flight was coming from. I look to her and take a breath. "Ready, Thelma?"

She gives me a funny look as we stand and make our way to the gate. I have to admit, I'm kind of starting to like her. Maybe we could have been friends under different circumstances. But since we're caught in the middle of two dumb kids and two Lady Macbeths, I doubt that's gonna happen.

Into the breach, Lorelai. Your new son awaits.


	5. Chapter 5

The Gilmore-Grey Union Book II: The Homecoming

By Michael Weyer

POV: Vincent

"Oh my God."

At Rory's shocked voice, I get tense. "What is it?"

Rory nods and I see two figures standing outside the gate, both crossing their arms and staring right at us. My stomach plummets a bit as I recognize the one on the left. "Oh, damn. That's Amy."

"And that's my Mom."

I look at the other woman. Then I look at Rory. Then I look at the other woman again. I've heard the saying that if you want to know what a girl is going to look like years from now, just see her mother. However, I wasn't expecting to see what Rory is going to look like just ten years from now. "That's…your mom?"

"I told you, she gave birth to me young."

"You didn't say that young!"

We've reached them by now and there's a long silence as we stare at each other. Rory coughs and starts to introduce us. "Mom, this is Vincent. Vincent, this is my mother, Lorelai."

I stick out my hand. "Hi." She stares at it for a long moment before taking and we shake limply. I see Amy and swallow. "Oh and Rory, this is my sister, Amy."

"Hey." They exchange the same limp shake. There's another long silence and it dawns on me there's no real protocol for a situation like this. Licking my lips, I speak up. "So, um….you guys…come together?"

They give each other a quick glance. "No, we just met," Amy said. "We…had a little talk."

Oh, God, we are so screwed.

Lorelai looks to Rory. "Are you okay?" she softly asks.

Rory nods. "Yeah. I mean…you know. We're…getting there." She brushes her hair back as she takes a breath. "Um, do we know where we're going next? I mean, Grandpa and Grandma's or home or Hartford?"

Lorelai snorts. "I think we want to avoid Sid and Nancy for a while yet. Besides, Luke wants to talk to you."

Rory rolls her eyes. "Great."

"And Taylor wants to talk to you. And Paris. And Miss Patty. And Sookie. And…"

"Oh my God, it's all over town?"

Lorelia nods and then looks to me and Amy. "Miss Patty was doing Matt Drudge years before the Internet was invented."

"Miss Patty?" Amy asks.

"Dance instructor, town gossip and the libido of Samantha from 'Sex in the City' in the body of JLo's mother."

Amy and I exchange baffled glances as we try to process the image. "Um…ok," Amy finally says. "So, we're headed to this town of yours?"

"Yep, good old Star's Hollow," Lorelai says.

I raise an eyebrow. "Star's? Any relation to Sleepy?"

"Well, there was the time Kirk accidentally chopped the head off the statue of Taylor," Rory says.

"Ah, yes," Lorelai says with a wistful look on her face. "And then the kids were using it as a kickball while Taylor chased them around the park."

"Fun times."

I can feel the look Amy is giving me right now. The look that reflects the feelings I have right now.

What the hell kind of family have I married into?


	6. Chapter 6

The Gilmore-Grey Union Book II: The Homecoming

By Michael Weyer

POV: Lane

The life of a rising rock band takes more out of your time than you'd think. But I never realized how much it left me out of the loop until I heard, from my Mom of all people, about Rory.

She called me out of the blue which was throwing on multiple levels. For one, I forgot my mom even knew how to use a telephone. For another, it's been a long time since she tried to initiate a conversation with me.

"Have you heard of your friend?" are her first words.

"Mom?" I asked, obviously confused. "What are you…"

"Your friend, the Rory!" she snaps. "You see why I have tried to keep you on the proper path? She goes and gets married and-----"

"Excuse me!" I erupt. "What are you talking about?"

"I heard it around the town!" Mom goes on. "She got married to some man she met while drinking! You see what I have warned you of? You see what I was trying to keep you away from? Perhaps now, you may thank----"

I hang up on her, a move I'm sure will be earning me a few hundred prayers for my soul later on. I immediately dial up another number and wait for it to pick up.

"Hello?"

"Rory, it's Lane. What is going on? Is it true?"

I hear her sigh. "Yeah, it is. I'm sorry, I was gonna call you but it's a little chaotic at the moment."

"Oh my God!" I gasp out loud. "You…got married? To who?"

"His name is Vincent Grey, he's a writer in Hartford. I'm with him now."

"Are you home?"

"Heading over. I'm with Mom and his sister."

Yikes. Now there's a car pool I'm more than grateful not to be a part of. "Man oh man, Rory…This is so huge…"

"I know, I know. We're trying to figure it out now. I have no idea how we're handling it of course but we're trying."

I shake my head hard. "Rory…is there…I mean…anything I can do?"

She sighs. "I don't know, Lane. I don't think there is at the moment. I'm just trying to handle this mess."

I let out a long breath. "Rory…Why didn't you call me? We're friends, remember? I had to hear about it from my mother, which is like Michael Moore getting his news from Fox!"

"I know, I was going to but…well, I've had a few other things on my mind."

I can hear the sharpness in her tone and I realize she must be fraying close to the edge so I back off a bit. "Okay…um…when are you coming?"

"We should be in town in an hour or so, probably going straight over to Luke's."

"Okay, I'll see you there."

"Lane, you don't------"

"Hey!" I cut in. "First, you broke your promise to let me be your maid of honor. I think you at least owe me a meeting with your hubby!"

She sighs again. "Okay, okay. I'll see you there."

I soften my tone. "Hey…it'll be okay. I know it will."

"Thanks for lying," she says before hanging up. I do too and rise to get my stuff together. The band is going to have to call of practice tonight. Some things take precedence over a future MTV slot and a best friend's drunken marriage is one of them.

Now I just have to worry about ignoring Mom for a while. In that, I think I'll be a tad more successful than either of the Gilmore ladies.


	7. Chapter 7

The Gilmore-Grey Union Book II: The Homecoming

By Michael Weyer

POV: Miss Patty

In all my years in this lovely hamlet, I have never come across a story so juicy to gossip about.

Most of the time, it's stuff you expect. Sookie and Jackson, Taylor and Kirk's shenanigans, most of the Winter Carnival hookups. Hell, we had a betting pool for years on when Lorelai and Luke were finally going to face up to their feelings and get engaged.

But this…this is something none of us expected.

At first, I didn't want to believe it when Sookie told me what she'd heard. This was one time I had to get it straight from the horse's mouth and called Lorelai myself. She was a mess but she confirmed it and so I had to tell everyone else so they could get it straight.

It's still hard to believe. First, there was that mess with the boat crash and the arrest and trial. From Jess, we would have expected that but Rory? I could never anticipate that from Rory. Still, to leap to something like this…

Now, I can understand her hooking up with someone else. I never liked that Logan boy. Handsome, yes. Sexy, yes. Good for a night together, of course but a relationship? He doesn't deserve her, we all agree on that.

But to marry someone else? That's something even I wouldn't jump into, even with my libido. So, the whole town is concerned about Rory and just who it is she's coming home with.

I'm waiting in the park when I see Lorelai's car coming up and parking by Luke's. I stand and head toward it as everyone gets out. There's Lorelai and Rory and there's a woman I don't know, a bit older than Lorelai, nice looking. And there…

Oh my. Oh my, my, my.

I feel my heart flutter as I walk over, my heels clicking. "Rory! Rory, sweetie!"

She sees me and it's almost like she winces before smiling. "Hi, Miss Patty."

I sweep her into a huge hug. "Oh, darling, we have been so worried about you? It's all over town, everyone's heard about it. Darling, are you all right?"

"I'm fine, Miss Patty."

"You didn't get married because…" I wave a hand over my belly.

"No!" Rory and the boy both yell as Lorelai and the other woman rub their heads. "We just met!" the man says.

"Oh, yeah, Patty, this is Vincent and that's his sister, Amy," Rory introduces us. "This is Miss Patty, I told you about her."

"Oh yes," Vincent says, nodding as he sticks out a hand. "Nice to meet you."

I shake it and bow my head. "Oooh, charmed." I smile and lean in toward Rory. "Wow…you have such excellent judgment when drunk."

"Patty!" Lorelai cries out.

"So, Vincent," I say in a coying voice. "How are you liking our town?"

"It's…quaint," he says, obviously a bit flustered. Well, I do have that effect on men. I'm aware his sister is giving me the eye. Well, easy, lady, I'm being charming here.

"Yes, we do like it," I say. "Wait until you see the town meeting tonight. You, my boy, are going to be the center of attention."

"Meeting?" Rory blurts, her eyes wide. "Taylor's called a meeting about us?"

"Well, not you, per se but I'm sure it will come up," I tell her. I turn back to Vincent and smile more. "You're going to be quite the eyeful for the town ladies…"

"Okay," Lorelai interrupts. "Patty, we need to see Luke so maybe we'll check back with you later today?"

"Sure, hon," I say, dropping Vincent's hand as I back up. I give him a nice wink. "It was so nice to meet you."

"Um…you too?" he manages to stammer before Rory pulls him away. I watch them head to Luke's, admiring that man's lovely backside. My, my, Rory, you can pick them. So nice and virile. A shame he's taken but a girl can dream…


	8. Chapter 8

The Gilmore-Grey Union Book II: The Homecoming

By Michael Weyer

POV: Luke

I'm having a bad day already. It's a day where I get some customers who can't quite seem to get the entire "have your order ready within five minutes of sitting down" theory that really should be common knowledge for all restaurant goers by now. Then I get one lady who seems to be under the impression I'm an IHOP, despite the fact there's no huge sign outside and my menu is actually leaning more toward food items than funny graphics around the edges.

So I'm already in a bad mood which of course is Kirk's cue to come up and bug me about…Oh, man, I can't even describe it…

"Here," he says as he hands me a book.

I frown and take it, looking at the cover and I can feel my eyes bug out. "The Stepdad's Guide to Grandfathering!" I stare at him. "Where the he answers. "It's amazing how selective you can be there."

"Kirk, why are you giving me a book on being a grandfather right now?"

"Should I have waited until lunch?"

"No, it doesn't matter what time! Why are you giving me this?"

"I thought you'd need it."

"Why would I need it?"

"Would you prefer Daddies for Dummies?"

"So I'm classified as a dummy?"

"No…No, no, God, no, I never meant to trash your good name!"

"Kirk….talk to me now."

He takes a deep breath. "I bought it for you. I thought it'd be good to have considering Rory's…condition."

"Condition?" It hits me what he's talking about. "She's not pregnant, Kirk."

"Luke, I know it's not an easy subject but you can come clean about it."

"She's not pregnant, Kirk."

"Then why is she married so fast?"

"It's not pregnancy, Kirk. It was alcohol."

"Alcohol? She shouldn't be drinking when she's pregnant."

"She's not pregnant, Kirk!"

"She's not?"

"No!"

"Oh." He frowns. "So…I'm guessing I shouldn't have sent Lorelai that crib?"

"You sent her a crib?"

"It was my crib."

"Kirk, even for you, keeping your own crib is a level of disturbing that boggles the mind."

"My mom kept it."

"That explains so much."

"So you're sure she's not pregnant."

"Yes, I'm sure, Kirk."

"I see. I'd better go tell Taylor."

"For the love of God, tell me you haven't discussed this with Taylor."

"I discuss everything with Taylor, Luke. I think he sees me as a protégé."

"He sees you as an intern he doesn't have to pay, Kirk."

"But he still sees me."

"Get out, Kirk."

"But my------"

"Out, Kirk."

"But------"

I just glare at him and he quickly gets the hint for once and takes off. I shake my head as I go to refill my coffee pot. I have no idea how much of this I'll be able to take and that's even without the inevitable visit that's sure to push my stress level to the extreme.

I hear the bell over the door ring and turn to see Lorelai and Rory enter with a pair of people. One is about Lorelai's age, maybe a bit older, nice looking if a bit tightly strung. The other is….

That's him. That's the guy I'm probably going to have to kill if Lorelai says to.

I set the cup down and take a deep breath as I walk over. It's time to meet this guy and find out how bad this situation is.

Hell, it's better than talking to Kirk again.


	9. Chapter 9

The Gilmore-Grey Union Book II: The Homecoming

By Michael Weyer

POV: Amy

It's not too bad a diner. Reminds me a bit of the one Jared left to Mom, but brighter. There's only a few people inside as Lorelai leads us to a table by the window. "Here we go," she says. "I'll order for us."

"We haven't seen the menus," Vincent points out as we sit.

"Don't need to," Lorelai says. "We know what to order."

A guy comes up to us in jeans, a flannel shirt and a backwards baseball cap. He has a sour look on his face and a coffee pot in his hand. "Hey," he says.

"Hi, Luke," Rory says with a small smile.

"Rory," he replies as he picks up her cup and pours into it. "You've been the talk of the town, kiddo."

"So I gather," she says with a sad sigh.

Vincent frowns a bit at her. "You drink coffee this late?"

"I drink coffee any time," Rory replies. "Been doing it since I was nine."

I stare at her. "You've been drinking coffee since you were nine?"

"Mom wanted to start me earlier but I resisted."

"Which was futile," Lorelai states.

"You let your daughter drink coffee at nine years old!" I demand. "Do you have any idea what that can do to a child that age?"

"Make her smart and pretty like me?"

"No, it can stunt growth and cause addiction!"

"Oh, thank God," Luke states as he fills Lorelai's cup. "A woman with sense. I think I got engaged to the wrong brunette."

She glares at him as he backs up. He puts the pot down at a nearby table and sits next to us. "Okay," he says as he leans back in the chair. "So what's our situation now?"

"We're trying to figure that out," Vincent states. "I didn't expect to be in this situation at all."

"You and me both," Rory says. "I still can't understand why we couldn't settle this in Atlantic City."

"Because your grandmother wants to go Rumsfield on your new hubby," Lorelai says.

"Is she really that bad?" I ask out loud.

"Yes," Luke and Lorelai reply in unison.

"And we have another problem," Luke stated. "Seems the scuttlebutt around town is that Rory is pregnant."

"What?" The two women yelp. "Why do they think that? Who said that?" Rory demands.

"Kirk gave me a book and a crib."

"Kirk has a crib?"

"It was his crib and please don't make me go into the whole thing again."

Vincent and I exchange a baffled look. "Um, no offense," Vincent pipes up. "But can we have something to eat before we continue?"

Luke glares at him. "And you assume I'll do that for you?"

"Um, aren't you the owner?"

His face falls. "Damn, you're right." He sighs and gets up. "Okay, I'm assuming Rory will take the Hot Pockets and grilled cheese."

"How do you know that's what she wants?" I ask.

"It's Tuesday, isn't it?"

I glance over at Lorelai. "You let her eat like this?"

"Always have."

"You know, you're lucky my mother isn't in this area or she would have been called on you years ago."

Vincent chuckles at that while Luke just gives a puzzled look before heading away. "Hey, we didn't-----"

"How about a chicken sandwich for you and a burger for your bother?" he calls out.

I shut my mouth. "Um…yeah, that'll work." I turn over to Lorelai. "Damn, he's good."

"You better believe it," she says with a sly wink.

Rory coughs to change the subject. "So when do we meet Grandma and Grandpa?"

"I haven't talked to them yet."

"Why don't you call them on your cell?" I ask.

They both look at me like I'm crazy. "We're in Luke's," Rory says as if that explains it.

I blink. "So?"

"Luke!" Lorelai calls out. "Amy wants to use her cell phone in here!"

"No cell phones!" he yells from the kitchen. "Dammit, I'll take this spatula to it if she even so much as opens it in this place!"

She nods to me and I swallow, wondering yet again what kind of a town we've wandered into. Luke comes out of the kitchen a few moments later and nods to us. "Food will be up soon."

Before any of us can reply, the bell over the door rings and Luke turns to face it. "Can I help you?"

"Yes, actually. A rather robust woman said that my daughter and my son and his new wife could be found here. I'd like to yell at them all."

I freeze, my eyes bugging out. I slide them toward Vincent and he has the same look of horror on his face. We slowly turn to face the woman standing before the door

"Hi, mom," I manage to get out as she glares at us both. I glance over at the confused Gilmores and sigh deeply. These poor, innocent darlings have no idea how to handle the hurricane that is Maxine Grey.


	10. Chapter 10

The Gilmore-Grey Union Book II: The Homecoming

By Michael Weyer

POV: Maxine

I don't like driving long distance. I truly don't. At my age, driving is a task in and of itself. I especially don't enjoy having to leave Hartford and make my way to a small town where my son and his new wife are waiting for me.

It takes me a while to find a parking space as it appears this town predates Henry Ford by several generations. I soon find myself lost, something I thought would be impossible in a podunk this size. Fortunately, I'm able to get directions. Unfortunately, it's from a woman who immediately ranks as one of the most bizarre I have ever met.

"Oh yes," she says, taking a drag on her cigarette. "I met Rory and Vincent earlier. Oh my, my, that boy…I have to tell you, if I was younger…well, hell, even now, I could have soo much fun with that boy…"

Given how this woman could probably crush Vincent like a bug, I shudder to think what kind of "fun" she's imagining. "Yes. I'll, ah, be sure to pass that along."

"So, why are you looking for him?" she asks. "Oh! Is he your, ah, own plaything?" She gives me a wicked knowing smirk.

"No, actually, he's my son."

The smirk vanishes. "Oh. Well, I do think they went to Luke's." She points the way to a building nearby.

"That's a hardware store," I say as I stare at the sign overhead.

"No, it's a diner."

"Then why is there a hardware store sign hanging over it?"

"That's his father's. He never got rid of it."

I sigh deeply and rub my face. Somehow, I already know I'm going to regret walking through that door. I take a deep breath and head over to the diner/hardware store, opening up the door and entering.

I will deny it, of course, but I must feel a certain tiny thrill within me at the terror on the faces of my children at my appearance. I look them over before concentrating on the two people on the other side of the table.

I've met far more teenage mothers than any person has a right to in their lifetime so I'm not terribly surprised at how young the mother is as I imagined Vincent and Amy were. She seems rather professional at the moment, if a bit confused. The daughter…

My daughter-in-law…

Well, she's pretty, I have to say that, which is good. And she seems to be holding up well in all of this. It's a bit early to get the full impression of course. After all, when I first met Gillian, I had no clue as to the high-strung behavior she had within herself.

"Hello, Maxine Grey," I introduce myself.

"Lorelai Gilmore, this is Rory." I shake hands with both, Rory looking me over and obviously nervous.

"May I sit?" I do before anyone says anything and take off my coat. "So…what is good to eat here?"

"We have coffee," Lorelai says as she and Rory hold up their cups. "We're okay at the moment."

"Rory's been drinking coffee since she was nine," Amy says.

My appraisal of these two takes a mild blow. "Oh." I shrug it off and move on. "Well, then…it appears you are a member of the family now. Hopefully, that is a situation we can soon remedy."

"Mom," Vincent starts but I hold up my hand.

"Now, Rory…If I can call you that." She nods. "Rory, you seem like a nice young lady and I appreciate how difficult a situation this must be for you. But the basic fact is, I am not allowing my son to stay married to a 21 year-old."

"Um, Maxine?" Lorelai states. "No offense, I fully agree but you really can't allow or not allow anything for my daughter."

I give her a cool look. "Ms. Gilmore…Believe me, I know exactly what you're going through but you have to realize this situation cannot stand."

"I do agree," she says. "But I also have to tell you, it's not entirely up to us."

"She's right," Amy chimes in. "This is Vincent and Rory's problem, Mom."

"Actually," Lorelai says. "I meant it's not up to us as in my parents are going to want to have a say in this."

"Well, I don't see that being much of a problem," I say and am taken aback by the sardonic laughs the two of them make. "Am I missing something?"

"Yes and be grateful for that," Lorelai states.

I shuffle in the chair. "Well, whatever the case, I'm hoping we can handle this is in a civil manner. I would hate to make this more difficult than it is."

"Too late." That comes from a gruff man with an equally gruff voice who has just appeared by the table to pour some coffee.

"I beg your pardon?" I ask, a bit thrown.

"Mom, this is Luke," Amy introduces us. "He's Lorelai's fiancée."

I nod to him. "I assume this is your place?"

"No, actually, there was another guy named Luke who owned it. I legally changed my name in order to run it."

I make a thin smile at his sardonic answer. Oddly, I find myself liking him instantly. "Well, Luke, I believe this is a family matter so if you don't mind terribly…"

"He is family," Rory states. "More than my own father has been. So he has as much a say in this as you do."

"Unless he pushed you out of a very small crevice of his body, I daresay my say is a bit more than his."

Lorelai snorts loudly at that and he glares at her. "Sorry," she says. "But she does raise a good point."

He points at her. "Don't make me cut off your coffee."

She smirks back. "Ah, ah, can't threaten me like that anymore."

"Why not?"

"You cut off coffee, I cut off sex."

Vincent nearly chokes on his own drink as Amy snickers. "Okay, line has been crossed!" Rory calls out.

I close my eyes and rub my temples as it hits me that this is going to be more of an in-law nightmare than Gillian or Michael ever were.


	11. Chapter 11

The Gilmore-Grey Union Book II: The Homecoming

By Michael Weyer

POV: Lane

I can feel the tension rolling in as soon as I enter Luke's. I used to work here so I know the difference between tension of customers and tension of family matters. And oh boy, is the latter clogging us up.

I see them by the table instantly. Rory and Lorelai of course and there's a hot guy which I assume is the new hubby. Wow, can't fault Rory's taste. He at least seems better than Dean or Logan in the looks department. With him are a nice-looking brunette Lorelai's age and a gray-haired woman who seems pretty annoyed by all of this.

"Lane!" Rory calls out as she sees me enter. "What are you doing here?"

"I told you I'd be coming," I explain as I give her a quick hug. I look to the strangers and smile. "Hi, I'm Lane, I'm Rory's best friend."

"Oh, hi," the guy says. "I'm Vincent Grey, this is my sister Amy and this is my mother, Maxine."

I nod to each of them and then look at Rory. "Okay, we gotta talk." I grab her by the arm, hoisting her up and pulling her away.

"Lane!" she cries out as I drag her outside. The others all look at us in surprise but I give them a smile. "Don't worry, I'll be right back. Girl talk." I pull her out and across the street, her trying to pull away the whole time.

"Okay, details," I say as I turn to her. "Where's he from, how was he, is this for real?"

"Lane, Lane, take it easy," she replies, putting her hands on my shoulders. "I don't know as much about him as I'd like. Well, except he wrote that book and he's working on another in Hartford. And he was married once but she left him. And he's as confused by all of this as I am."

"Hmm…and he's damn hot too?"

"Lane!"

"Oh, please, even you can't be so dense as to notice!"

"Lane…"

"Come on, you've got to have some juicy details!"

"What details I may have are lost in the haze of cheap bourbon."

"Oh, he couldn't afford the good stuff?"

"LANE!"

"There you are!"

We both turn to see a fiery blonde marching toward us, eyes fixed right on Rory who lets out a long groan. "I've been looking for you!"

"Hi, Paris," Rory weakly says.

She gives me the barest of glances before starting in on Rory. Now, Paris and I have only met a handful of times but I've always been struck by the fact that she's the only other non-Gilmore I know who can say ten sentences in the length of time it takes other people to say two.

I manage to catch up as best I can, somewhere around the eighth "how could you do this!" shriek. "You are throwing your life away, you are ruining all our plans, how do you think you can handle being a wife?"

"Paris, we just got her, we're just dealing with----"

"I don't care what you're dealing with, we're dealing with this now! We were supposed to be ruling the academia of Yale right now! We are supposed to be readying to make all others tremble in our shadow before unleash shock and awe in debate clubs! Now, I'm broke and working at an inn and you're married to some, some-----where the hell is this bastard anyway?"

"He's in there," I helpfully say, pointing to the window showing the interior of the diner. Paris looks at it and blinks a couple of times. "Damn, he looks good."

"He does, doesn't he?" I say. "I'd marry him in a drunken haze."

"Me too, probably."

Rory is looking from one of us to the other. "I thought you were supposed to be helping me!"

"Sorry," we both say. Paris shakes her head. "Okay, so he's handsome, that's a point in his favor. But he's still nowhere near your level!"

"He's an author, Paris. His first book won a couple of awards."

"Okay…" she says, obviously trying to deal with that little factoid. "But still, he…I mean…" She shakes her head. "Rory, this is still way too big a step. I mean, okay, he's a step up from Logan."

"Got that right,'" I say.

"Excuse me?" Rory gasps.

"Rory, his dad destroyed your dream and his son is pretty much the same," Paris states.

"You were doing great before he came along," I agree. "Now, you're a married drop-out! I think it's safe to draw a line as to how much good he's done for your life now."

I can't tell if she's more shocked by what we're saying or by the fact we're on the same side on this. She just shakes her head and throws up her arms. "Look, I don't know what's going on. I'm not broken up with Logan, I can tell you that much."

"Really?" I press. "Then where is he now?"

"Well, he…I mean…" she shrugs. "We decided to take a break until this got handled."

"Uh huh." Paris and I exchange a look. "Stop that," Rory hisses. "I don't….I'm still with Logan, I'm not breaking up with him, I just…"

"Have a husband now," Paris states. "And one, I might add, who seems a bit better to handle than Logan is."

"You haven't even met him!"

"I'm good at judging people." That earns her a major blank look from Rory so I quickly step in. "Rory, you have to face the facts that one way or another, this guy is probably going to be in your life for a while."

"No, he won't! He's going to get the annulment and we'll never see each other again!"

Paris snorts. "Oh, please. I know how your family works, Gilmore. People you think you're never going to see again come back all the time to cause drama. It's like you've got your own field of gravity to suck in the troublemakers."

"Can't get more troublemaking than a hubbie," I add.

Rory throws up her hands and turns away. "I am not staying married to the guy! I don't…I don't even know if I like him."

Paris and I exchange a knowing smile at that. I've known Rory longer than she has so I know when she feels something. And hearing her protest over not liking her hubbie is like hearing Jessica Simpson and Lindsay Lohan protest over Pink slamming them in a video.

"Is that Taylor?" Our musings are cut off by Rory's question. We all look up and sure enough, Taylor is marching toward Luke's diner, a sheet of papers in his hands.

"What is he doing?" Paris asked.

I see the papers and my eyes widen. "Oh, no. I…thought Kirk was just joking."

Rory turns to me, fear in her eyes. "Joking about what?"

I lick my lips. "He…he said Taylor was trying to get a petition going to make sure the marriage is annulled fast."

Paris' eyes widen. "Excuse me? What does he think this is, 1806?"

"He's going into the diner," Rory moans. "With the petition."

"Oh, dear sweet Buddha," I remark. We exchange glances and then take off running. Rory is out to stop it, of course but Paris and I, in a record, are on the same page for the third time in five minutes.

We want front row seats for the impending smack-down.


	12. Chapter 12

The Gilmore-Grey Union Book II: The Homecoming

By Michael Weyer

POV: Lorelai

So, I'm in Luke's, talking to the new in-laws and wondering how in the world this situation can get more stressful.

Lo and behold, Taylor arrives to answer my question.

"Ah, good morning!" he says as he enters. "It's good to see you all gathered here today on such an important occasion!"

"Get out, Taylor," Luke immediately intones.

Taylor ignores him and focuses on me. "Lorelai. I have to tell you, this is a situation that I would never have expected to occur."

The sky is falling. Dogs are laying down with cats. Paris Hilton is joining a convent. I agree with Taylor. I just nod as he goes on.

"So, I'm sure you'll agree with the steps I've taken regarding this."

"What steps?" Maxine asks.

He frowns. "Who are you?"

"Maxine Grey. This is my daughter Amy and this is Vincent."

"Taylor Doose," he proclaims in that manner he has as if he's auditioning for caller at Buckingham Palace. They still have that position, don't they? I mean, the British can't go anywhere without someone announcing them. They called them callers back then, today they're called paparazzi.

"I am the town magistrate and owner of Doose's market," he goes on, somehow making it sound like it's the most important position on the East Coast.

Maxine nodded. "I see. Well, Mr. Doose, just what is your interest in this?"

"My interest is that this is an event that impacts this town greatly, madam."

Vincent snorts. "It's that dull around here?"

Taylor glares at him. "We all care for Rory very much and we take it personally when she is shackled into an unwanted matrimony."

"Excuse me?" Vincent says. "Shackled?"

"Now, sir, I must say, taking advantage of a poor, innocent girl in a moment of weakness is extremely low and it is all I can do to prevent me thrashing you right now."

Vincent just stares at him and I know he's thinking he can take Taylor. Hell, Sookie's kid can take Taylor. He just goes on talking, oblivious as usual. "And so, on behalf of the people of Star's Hollow, I am handing you this." He pushes a sheet of paper at Vincent.

He takes it and frowns. "What is this?"

"A petition," Taylor smugly declares. "Signed by two hundred and twenty-seven citizens demanding an immediate annulment to your marriage to Rory."

We all just stare at him. "Taylor…I actually have to sit down for this," Luke says before doing so.

Vincent's eyes are wide. "Are you kidding?"

Taylor shakes his head. "No, sir. You are to annul this marriage and then consider yourself exiled from Star's Hollow for life!"

Amy looks around. "There has got to be a camera around here. I mean, people like this can't actually exist!"

"Taylor," Luke starts. "You have done something I didn't think possible. You've made Lorelai speechless."

Indeed, my jaw is wide open as I stare at Taylor, not able to believe he's actually gone this far. Amy is taking the petition and looking over it as Maxine stares at Taylor as well. "Sir, I don't know who you think you are but involving an entire town in a personal matter is uncalled for!"

"Mrs. Grey," he says in a condescending tone. "I am the town magistrate. I am the head of the Stars Hollow Business Association, the Stars Hollow Tourist Board, the Stars Hollow Neighborhood Watch Organization, and the Stars Hollow Citizens for a Clean Stars Hollow Council."

"I don't care if you're the head of the Stars Hollow Arrogant Prick Club, you do not dictate what my family can do!"

"Yeah, only she gets to do that," Vincent says.

Taylor sniffs. "Madam, I would advise you go along with this or face the wrath of the S.H.B.A., the S.H.T.B., the S.H.N.W.O. and the S.H.C.C.S.H.C."

"Why don't you K-I-S-S my A-S--------"

"Excuse me!" Amy pipes in, studying the petition. "But, ah, there are some comments with the signatures."

"Comments?" I ask

Amy nods. "Yes…let's see…One agrees we need a new stoplight…One says that yes, the ice cream shop could use another flavor…and this one…" She looks up, one eyebrow raised. "Just what does my brother's marriage have to do with the new state tax initiative?"

Taylor licks his lips as Luke groans. "Taylor…tell me you didn't…"

"You didn't tell these people what this petition was for, did you?" Amy asks. Taylor's face is the answer. "Well, in that case, this entire petition is moot and thus cannot be enforced."

He tries to remain dignified. "Madam, with all respect, I am a magistrate and I believe I know the legalities of such an action."

"Really?" she says in a dry tone. "I'm a judge and I was a Wall Street lawyer before that and I can tell you, there isn't a court in this state that wouldn't laugh this out. And I mean that literally."

I grin as I see Taylor sputter. Oh, wow, there's finally some good in this. I just made a new best friend for life.


	13. Chapter 13

The Gilmore-Grey Union Book II: The Homecoming

By Michael Weyer

POV: Richard

Dealing with Emily on the best of days can be a trying experience. Dealing with her today has been a complete and utter nightmare.

I thought nothing could top her reaction to Lorelai getting pregnant. Obviously, I was mistaken. Then again, it is a rather unusual situation to say the least. Our granddaughter had a drunken marriage and is coming home with her new husband now.

It's been difficult to handle, what with calling Logan and then the hotel where the marriage took place. I got the fax of the license and sadly, it does appear to be legally binding. So for now, the marriage stands.

I sit back in my den, rubbing my nose as I try to figure out our next move. Emily is in the living room, probably on her third bourbon. I informed the maid that she's to be cut off now but I highly suspect Emily will simply fire her and hire another one that'll let her do it.

Right now, I have a somewhat unenviable task before me. It will be difficult but I figure it's far better if I do it than Emily, who frankly is close enough to the edge as it is. I pick up the phone and dial the number.

It takes a few moments for the line to pick up. "Hello?"

"Lorelai? It's your father."

There's a cool silence before she speaks. "Hi, Dad. To what do I owe the pleasure?"

I sigh. I know Lorelai is still upset with us for what happened with Rory. I thought it was the right thing, I still hold to that. But Lorelai could never understand the sacrifices we made for her and Rory. "Lorelai, I want to say, I don't want to make this more difficult than it already is."

"Pretty hard to do that, Dad," she notes.

"Where are you?"

"I'm at Luke's. Rory is here along with her…husband. And his sister and mother."

I blink, a bit thrown at that. "Ah. I see…Well, that might actually make things easier."

"Easier?" I note suspicion in her voice. "What are you planning, Dad?"

I take a deep breath. "I wanted to invite them to dinner this Friday. All of them, a meeting between the families."

Dead silence fills the line. "Lorelai? Lorelai, are you there?"

"Dad," she finally answers. "Have you finally lost it?"

"I beg your pardon, Lorelai!"

"Dad…you want to drag these people into the horror show that is our family gatherings? You know I swore Friday nights off after what Mom did with Christopher!"

"Lorelai, she meant well…."

"She almost broke up me and Luke!" she erupts. "I am not-----"

"Yes, you are!" I snap back. "Dammit, Lorelai, this is not about you! This is about Rory and getting this situation under control. Now, I know you have your problems with your mother and I don't expect you to just get over them right away but dammit, this is not a discussion! There are things bigger than you, Lorelai!"

"Dad…they may not be open to it."

"Then convince them." I soften my tone. "Lorelai…please. I am not going to…ambush this man. I truly do want to meet him. I think…at the least…you owe your mother and I that."

There's another silence before she sighs. "Fine…fine…I'll talk to them. But…no promises." She hangs up as do I. I sit back, breathing out as I reflect on what is about to happen.

A dinner with Emily meeting her new son-in-law and his family with Lorelai no doubt bringing Luke with her and this man's mother, sister and who knows what other relatives and their better halves.

Oh, dear God, what have I just done?


	14. Chapter 14

The Gilmore-Grey Union Book II: The Homecoming

By Michael Weyer

POV: Amy

I'm watching as Mom and this Taylor guy keep arguing while Lorelai is outside on her phone. Once again, I feel like I'm in some sort of Bizarro Mayberry with this guy under the impression he's the Mayor. Still, it's always unique to see the Maxine Grey school of diplomacy at work.

"What part of 'family matter' is not registering with you?" she's shrieking at him. I glance over to where Rory has entered with these two friends of hers. All three are staring with amazement at the sight of Taylor getting chewed out.

"Madam, I have tried to explain that as the magistrate------"

"Good Lord, do you realize what year this is? What century? You do not get to run the personal lives of everyone in this town!"

Luke snorted. "You obviously haven't been here before."

Taylor glares at him before returning his gaze to Maxine. "Madam------"

"I swear to God on high, I will punch you if you call me that again," Mom says and I snort at that.

"Taylor," Rory says. "Can you just leave right now? We need to talk about this."

"Rory, I am only looking out for your best interests," he says in a condescending tone. Oh, this isn't going to go over very well.

"My best interests, Taylor, are dealing with this with my family, not with the whole town! We went through this already with Mom and Luke's break-up and you dividing us up with ribbons!"

"Ribbons?" I ask in disbelief.

"I was attempting to show them who was supporting them," Taylor intones.

"Taylor…just please leave. Please."

Taylor brought himself up with what he seemed to think was dignity. "Well, I can tell when I'm not wanted."

Luke snorted. "You haven't been able to tell for the last twenty years, Taylor. Why start now?"

He just gives a "humph" sound before walking to the door. "Well, you can be sure that the town meeting will not deal with this so lightly."

"Taylor, I swear, if you actually bring this up at the meeting, I'm finally going to go off and punch you right then and there!" Luke yells as he practically chases Taylor out the door. Lorelei enters at that moment, rubbing her face and shaking her head.

"What's up?" Rory asks.

Lorelei drops the hands and takes a deep breath as she faces us all. "This Friday, you are all going to be hurled into an experience that will tear at your stamina and suck away your will to live."

Luke frowns. "You are not going to make me watch 'Miss Congeniality 2' again, are you?"

Lorelei shakes her head. "I wish. No, we are all invited to dinner at my parent's house."

"Oh my damn," Rory declares, putting her face in her hands.

"Is…that bad?" I ask.

Luke sighs. "Your brother is about to be put on the altar and carved to shreds by a pair of superior-minded rich jerks."

"I've been there," Vincent said. "It's called being reviewed by the _New York Times_."

"So…we all have to go?" Rory says with trepidation.

"Dad said," Lorelei confirms. "And if we try to blow it off, there's no telling what Mom is going to do."

Mom nods. "Very well. What time?"

"Um…I'll have to call and check."

"I see." Mom turns to me and Vincent. "I'd better call Peter and Jillian, see what their schedule can be and Amy, perhaps you can find someone to take care of Lauren for that night?"

I purse my lips. "Mom, I'm not sure they meant us too."

"No, no, you have to come!" Lorelei pleads. "You can't leave your brother to their mercies!"

"Seriously," Luke tells us. "It's like Christians to the lions. He needs all the backup he can get."

"Thanks for referring to me like I'm not here," Vincent calls out.

"Vincent," Mom begins in _that_ tone. "I hardly think you are in any position to dictate anything at this moment."

"Mom, you can give him some slack here," I say.

"I've given him enough slack and he's now hanging himself, Amy," she replies.

"You know, a controlling mother could very well be the reason he's acting out like this," the Asian friend of Rory's says.

Mom just gives her a look that can melt ice and she actually steps back. "Oh, no," Vincent and I unison.

"Young lady," Mom begins. "You truly do not want to get yourself involved in this situation. As my children can attest, I am in a very poor mood as it is and am not going to argue this situation with children."

"Hey!" the blonde snaps. "We're Rory's friends and we're trying to help so why don't you back off a bit!"

I just close my eyes as Mom leans in, her face tight. "What is your name?"

"Paris," the young lady says, wilting a bit under the gaze as well as she should.

"Paris," Mom repeats. "Oh, good heavens." Taking a breath, she continues. "Paris, believe me, if it were you my son had married…and I'm very sorry for letting that image enter everyone's mind…you might have a say but as it is, it's between our family and Rory's."

Paris opens her mouth but I quickly interject. "Paris…don't press her. The last person named after a city who pressed my mother…" I shudder at the memory. "She was last seen curling up in a corner of her office crying before they led her away."

"Yeah, I remember that," Vincent says. "Not that she didn't deserve it. But the point is, getting involved in our mother's path is a foolish idea."

She seems thrown, as do the others. Well, after all the weirdness they've put us through the last few hours, it's about time for some of the same back at them.

I just wish I could shake this feeling in the pit of my stomach that I'd rather listen to a child abuse case than go to this dinner party.


	15. Chapter 15

The Gilmore-Grey Union Book II: The Homecoming

By Michael Weyer

POV: Vincent

I've only just met this Luke guy but I could already tell that he takes his place of business seriously. Seriously enough to want to get this major private affair out of one of the major public places in this town. So at Lorelai's suggestion, we're adjourning to her place of work.

Somehow, I can't shake the feeling this trip through Wonderland isn't quite over yet.

I have to admit, it's a nice inn. Old-styled but accommodating and the interior looks friendly enough. Lorelai is leading us around on the tour as we come up to the main desk.

"Hi, Michel," she says. "How's it going today?"

The black man glares up at her before replying. "How iz it going? You dare azk me zat after this morning?"

Oh. My. God.

It's the black Inspector Clouseau.

Lorelai sighs. "I'm sorry I left you to open up today but I had to…"

"I don't care," he snaps. "I never care. You should know that by now. I simply care about doing zis job, a concept you are apparently unable to grasp well."

Amy and I exchange a long look, both of us thrown by this guys' weird voice. He gazes at us with a sneer. "I azzume zis is ze lucky man?"

Lorelai nods. "Yeah, that's Vincent Grey, that's his sister, Amy and his mom, Maxine."

"Nice to meet you," Amy says. She smiles and utters something in French. The guy just stares at her as if she crawled out from under a log.

"What was zat?"

Amy frowns. "Um…It was just a French greeting."

"Do I look like I need a new goat?"

Amy licks her lips. "Oh, sorry. My daughter is taking French and she says that's a good way to open a conversation."

"Your daughter iz a moron."

Amy just stares at him as if he slapped her with a dead muskrat. I don't blame her as I can't tell you what my reaction would be if someone insulted my daughter so matter of factly.

"As much as I would love to hear my own language massacred back at me, there is a lot of work I must catch up on."

"Michel," Lorelai hisses. "Don't make me call your mother."

He gives her that same tired look. "At zis moment, zat would be a relief."

Mom narrows her eyes at him. "Sir, I don't mind telling you, your attitude is not what I'd expect from a hotel clerk."

"I'm sorry," he says in a tone about as un-sorry as you can get. "Should I bow and zcrape and kiss your heels? I am told such an attitude iz expected for such high and upscale persons as yourselves."

"What I expect is a modicum of respect," Mom fires back. "Or at least the illusion of it."

"I have never cared for illusions, only reality and the reality iz that if I don't like you, I shouldn't have to show it."

Wow, for a Frenchman, this guy's got balls for saying this to Mom's face. Mom herself is starting to get that early shade of crimson as Lorelai just sighs. "Michel, please…I need you to keep watching the front while I bring them into the dining room."

"Oh, but of course," he mockingly says. "You know I but live to zerve."

"Keep up the attitude towards me and I may fix half of that statement," Mom snaps at him.

He gazes at her, then moves it to me. "My advice to you iz to run. Run far, run fast, run now. Zis family zhall siphon off your will to live."

"Um…I'll take that under advisement," I say.

He just sniffs. "Yes, just like your country listened to us on Iraq…"

"Michel," Lorelai snaps. "You know the rule of no-politics here. Remember, I still have INS on speed-dial."

He just sneers at her. "Take this brood out of here before they scare off more of ze guests. Someone must keep zis place on an even keel."

"Thank you, Lord Nelson," Lorelai remarks as she leads us toward the dining room. I just look back at that odd man behind the desk as we go. It's Amy who asks what I'm thinking. "Why do you keep that guy employed?"

Lorelai shrugs. "I suck at bookkeeping. And a French accent is supposed to give the place more of an air."

"Oh, it gives an air all right," Mom states angrily. "Much like lower Manhattan."

We all head into the next room as that air of foreboding once more grips my stomach. Somehow, I'm doubting a meal is what's on the menu next.


	16. Chapter 16

The Gilmore-Grey Union Book II: The Homecoming

By Michael Weyer

POV: Sookie

I hear them come in and instantly start to rush out. "Oh, my God, Rory!" I squeal as I rush over and hug her. "Oh, wow oh wow oh wow! I can't believe it! I can't believe you're married!" I release the hug and pat her head. "Oh, man, if only you'd told me! I could have gotten a cake! I still have parts of your mom's cake left, I could have pieced it together, created a whole new one!"

I turn to look over the others. I'm guessing the guy is Vincent and he's not bad looking. No idea who the other two are so I take in initiative. "Hi, I'm Sookie, I'm the chef here."

I extend my hand, which they all just stare at. It takes me a minute to realize it's covered in sticky dough and I grimace and quickly wipe it off. "Sorry."

"Um…hi," the pretty brunette states. "I'm Amy Grey, this is my mom, Maxine and this is…"

"The lucky man!" I beam at him widely. "Wow, it's so nice to meet you! I have been SO hoping to see Rory get married! Of course, I was hoping it'd be the more traditional setup and all but hey, better than nothing, right?"

"I wouldn't be sure of that," this Maxine mutters. Her two children are just staring at me in some odd confusion as Lorelai rubs her temples.

"Sookie, um, we sorta need to talk things out here," she says. "Maybe you can, um…"

"Oh! Say no more!" I hold up my hands and rush to the side. "I've already got some treats set up!"

"Um, Sookie, that's not what I…"

I race over to the tables to start grabbing stuff. "Okay, got some of my new shortcakes, I've been dying to give them a test run, I guess now is good as time as any." I walk back and offer them a tray covered with tarts. Each is done up with green icing to form a heart with "R &" on them.

They all look over them and then back at me. "Um…why does it say that?" Rory asks.

"Oh, R is for you, obviously and the blank is, um, because I couldn't tell what your husband's name was." I pause and look to him. "What is it?"

He seems to pause, as if unsure if he should answer. "Vincent."

I nod and race over to grab an icer. I head back and quickly squirt a "V" over every cake I can. "Here you go!" I call out. "R and V! Together!"

Lorelai just stares at me. "Really not helping the situation, Sook."

I frown. "What? I just thought it'd be nice to get things off on the right foot!"

"About fifty steps too slow for that one," Vincent remarks as he takes one tart and chews on it. His eyes widen. "Wow, this is good!"

"Thanks!" I say. "I do my best!"

"Sookie is the best chef in Star's Hollow," Rory proudly states.

"I thought that Luke was," Amy notes.

"No, he's the best cook," I tell them. "I'm the best chef. There is a difference. Chefs are better."

"It's not called 'Iron Cook,'" Lorelai points out.

Maxine just shuffles in her chair. "I'm sure she's wonderful but we have better things to do than exchange recipes."

"Ooooh, do you have any good ones?" I quickly ask. I look to Amy. "How about you?"

Vincent nearly spits out his cake. Rory slaps a hand at his back as he half-laughs, half-coughs. "Amy? Cook? Please! She can't even boil water!"

Amy smacks him on the arm with an angry look. "I can cook!"

"You can burn," Vincent fires back.

"I've improved since you left town," she says.

"Yes, you only manage to toast every other meal," Maxine puts in.

"Well, it's better than you," I tell Lorelai who just sticks her tongue out at me.

"I don't need to cook," she announces proudly. "I have Luke."

I giggle. "Hmm…and he does cook well…"

Rory groans and holds her hands to her ears. "Please stop!"

"Yes, please," Amy begs. "Listening to her just reminds me how bad my own sex life is."

Vincent puts his hands over his own ears. "Amy!"

I smile as I see him and Rory, both covering their ears with matching looks of pain.

Aw. They are made for each other.


	17. Chapter 17

The Gilmore Grey Union Book II: The Homecoming

By Michael Weyer

POV: Gillian

When I married Peter, I had no idea I was basically marrying his family. It was the single biggest miscalculation I've ever made in my life, vastly underestimating how closely tied he was to his family. I'm not going to say I would never have married Peter if I knew I'd have daily encounters with his mother, sister and brother.

But I think I might have reconsidered it just a tad.

Right now, I have a bit much on my plate. Peter and I are still getting used to reconciling and of course there's raising the two kids on my plate. I do, however, have to admire the irony that I seem to be the one taking this whole thing the most calmly.

I'm helping Ned finish his lunch, always a fun chore. He seems to like my goofy laughs and smiles. Come to think of it, so did his father when we were dating. Walt's taking a nap which makes this a bit easier. I have to admit, after caring for two sons, I'm starting to understand Maxine a lot better.

I'm trying to figure out whether that's good or bad.

Peter comes in, running a hand over his face, obviously concerned. "How is it going?" I ask him.

He sighs as he slumps into a chair. "It's…ugh."

I wince. "That bad?"

Peter nods. "My brother is such an idiot. I just can't believe he could do this."

I lean in to wipe Ned's mouth. "There's a good boy," I tell him in my bright Mommy voice. "That's a good boy, you got it all down!"

"He just gets married. How can you be so impulsive?"

"Impulsive?" I ask, still talking in "goofy Mommy" voice. "Like joining a rock band at 40 and leaving the family business go into bankruptcy?"

He glares at me before speaking. "I just got off the phone with Mom. She's with them at this Rory's home, Star's Hollow."

I drop the voice as I stare at him. "Maxine is there?"

Peter nods. "Yep. You're right, I didn't want to go with Amy."

"Maybe if you'd listened to me more…"

"Gillian, please…"

I stop speaking as I take Ned's plate to the sink. "You're right. It's Vincent's screw-up we're working on, not yours." I start to wash the plate off. "So what are they doing?"

"Well, Rory's grandparents want to have some big dinner party tomorrow night," Peter answers. "We're all invited. Of course, Mom makes it clear it's not an invitation you can turn down."

I nod, well aware of how Maxine can take any social occasion and make it her own with little effort. "How's Vincent?"

Peter shrugs. "For spending the day with Mom and Amy after a colossal screwup, not too bad, I guess. I still can't believe this is happening."

"Well, I'm looking forward to meeting this Rory," I say. "Carol, I never really got along with. I still can't believe she could just dump Vincent like that after all he gave up for her."

"Well, this Rory seems more down-to-earth," Peter replies. "I think Vincent likes her."

I frown. "How can you tell?"

"Just the way he talks about her," he replies as he rubs his shoulder. "He denies it but I do think he's starting to fall for her a bit."

I roll my eyes. "Oh, just what we needed. Another lovely family melodrama."

Peter nods in agreement. "I don't know if this is going to end well for him or her."

I dry my hands and come up behind him. "We'll get through it. We've gotten through a lot worse."

He has to smile at that. "That's true." He frowns. "I do have to talk to him though. If this ends up going through, I'm going to have to help him figure out his will and what to leave her. And there's the insurance and this may add to the equity and let's not forget the impact on the family taxes, this could upset some of my accounting figures…"

I just sigh and back away. I love him. I do. But when he starts going all business-like, it's best to let him blow off steam. In that, he is similar to the rest of his family.

I admit I have a total selfish reason to want to meet this Rory person. At long last, I'll be able to share with another woman the agony and the ecstasy that is being married to the Grey family.


	18. Chapter 18

The Gilmore-Grey Union Book II: The Homecoming

By Michael Weyer

POV: Bruce

It's getting late as I finish up some of the files at the office. Having Judge Grey take a sudden day off throws a few things off but then it's my job to handle such things. I know she'll be able to get back on track once this whole Vincent deal is settled.

I am still wondering how this will effect Judge Grey. I know she's had her problems already with breaking up with David and teasing a run for Congress. I have to admit, it's better that she sticks with her job here. She's way too moral and upright to get herself bogged down in Washington politics.

Course, I have to admit, I'm also glad because I truly enjoy working with her, more than any other judge. I just can't see this place the same without her. She was born for this and I've hated seeing her sidetracked with stuff like criminal court. She's too good for that.

I'm wrapping up my paperwork when the phone rings and I pick it up. "Judge Grey's chambers."

"Bruce? It's Amy."

"Judge Grey. How are you?"

"Okay. Well, considering." I can hear the fatigue in her voice so I know the situation must be a lot more tiring than she's letting on. "How is my docket?"

"I managed to push a few things around, a couple of cases until tomorrow."

I hear her take a deep breath. "I'm going to need them pushed back a bit more."

I frown deeply. "Why?"

"Well, it seems Rory, that's the girl Vincent…" I can tell she doesn't want to say it.

"What about her?"

"Her grandparents want to have some big dinner, the whole family and everything for tomorrow night."

"Ah. So you need me to keep the docket clear then too?"

"Yeah. I know, it's a lot to ask so suddenly..."

"I've got it."

"Are you sure? I know you take such care with-------"

"Judge Grey," I gently cut her off. "I got it."

"Thanks, Bruce." I can she her flashing that great smile of hers. "Like I said, this is a big deal and we need to get ready for it."

"Not a problem. Anything else I can do for you?"

There's a slight pause before she speaks. "Um..actually…are you doing anything tomorrow?"

I pause, my pen hanging over the pad with the planned docket for tomorrow. "Ah, not really. Why?"

"Well…I thought…" She sounds uncertain before plunging ahead. "I was wondering if you'd like to come with."

I blink. I honestly didn't see this coming at all. "I…thought this was a family thing."

"Well, you're practically family."

"Judge Grey…"

"Bruce…I just would feel better if I came over with someone besides Mom. I know it's even more to ask and maybe it's not at all right but…"

"Judge Grey, are you asking me on a date?"

"Oh, God, no!" she laughs. "No, not a date at all. Just…a dinner with the family and, well, I admit I want to make a better impression with Rory's family by showing I do have something of a life and I thought you'd be good to help out with it and…"

I can hear the slight pleading in her tone and that's what tips my answer. "I'll be happy to."

"You…you will?" she sounds surprised to hear it. "Um…well, thank you!"

"You're welcome. Where is it?"

She gives me the directions. It's not too long a drive from Hartford and they're staying at some small inn before heading to the dinner. "You can come alone or get a ride with Peter and Gillian," she finishes.

"I'll see you there, Judge Grey."

"Thanks. Oh and Bruce…Ah…it might be a little better if you don't call me 'Judge Grey' all the time while you're there. You can call me Amy."

"I…don't fell right doing that, Judge Grey."

"At least…consider it, ok? Thanks, I have to go, I'll see you tomorrow, thanks a lot, Bruce."

She hangs up and I stare at the phone for a moment. On the one hand, this is crossing a line I've done my utmost to never cross. I believe we need some decorum between us. I'm her court officer, she's the judge, that's it.

However, she considers me a friend and for a family affair like this, that's what's important. So, for Vincent and this Rory, I'll do my best to be an escort for…

Amy.

**Coming Soon: Book III: The Dinner (or Friday Night Smackdown)**

**A family gathering so big it needed its own separate book. **


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